I'd like to tackle a somewhat-debated topic today.
Teens who get their own computers.
By teens, I mean around 14-17 year olds. 'course, once you're in college, it becomes a whole 'nother story.
My intent here is not to make a decision, but to outline the pros and cons. This is intended more towards parents thinking about letting their teen have a computer, but it may be helpful for teens trying to come up with a good argument, or something. I dunno.
The most worrisome parts to many parents of letting their teens have computers is safety. Especially when a computer is in a bedroom or other non-centralized spot, it is difficult to know who your teen is IM'ing, talking to on myspace, or chatting online with. It is a danger, yes, but many to most teens are very savvy and know better to chat with a random guy. There are many myspace horror stories, but even more teens who are smart about what they do and never make it into the media. You know your teen best. Do they seem to have good taste in real-life friends? Are they truthful when they tell you where they are going? They're probably responsible enough. It's a judgement call. But you should also take a look at your teen's myspace page, facebook page, and IM contacts (with the teen resent. It's not cool to just invade your teen's privacy and sort through thier stuff when they're gone) and take a cursory look at messages, contacts, and whoever. Ask the teen who a contact is , if it's someone you don't recognize. Also, set ground rules for social networking site use, such as the following:
- Only 'friend' people that you know in real life.
- Set your profile to private. (this allows only those approved as 'friends' to see the profile.
- Absolutely no cyberbullying of others (surprisingly common, with such tools as the application honesty box' on facebook that lets you leave anonymous messages for people.)
- Do not put certain personal info on pages (if your profile is private; it's probably okay to have a home phone number or email address, at least one thing for people to contact you. But no need to fill out everything they ask you for.)
- You know your teen best. What else should be included? Illegal behavior (hacking, pirating, illegal downloads) online? Periodic check-ups on homepages on social networking sites?
There are also scores of
parental monitoring softwares out there, as well as decent features included with operating systems such as
Windows Vista. Look into having the 'administrator account' on your teen's computer and choosing a software that either reports their actions to you or dictates what they can and can't do. However, some monitoring software just steps over the line. If you feel that you need to use software that captures the passwords your teen enters so that you can access all their accounts, your teen is probably not responsible enough to have their own computer. They will get free reign on their computer when they hit college, so you need to let them have some privacy now. They will make major mistakes if never allowed to make their own decisions until then.
Besides safety, there are other things to worry about. Computers are expensive, and many teens spend money on clothes and things without worrying about the cost. My parents give me no allowance whatsoever and I must buy all my own clothes and other stuff myself, out of money I work for. Making your teen pay for, say, half - or all - of the computer would emphasize to them what a big deal this is and that they must work and make sacrifices for it. It is not a right.
The reason my parents won't let me have my own computer is not safety - they know I'm savvy - or cost - I'm willing to pay for 100%. It is time management. I can go for hours at a time 'doing homework' and not get a thing done. Almost every day, I surf the net under the facade of doing homework. I'm a horrible procrastinator, and I'm certain my grades could be better if computers weren't available. It's a tough thing, but I've become infinitely better since last year. And the
parental controls of Vista would allow my parents to dictate when I'm allowed to do such things as browse the internet, probably a very good thing for me.
Got questions? Comment? Leave a comment. I'm curious to know your take on the issue. Please identify yourself as a parent, teen, or whatever, and leave the age of your kids if you're a parent.
R
